In ways I had never loved anyone before.
In a way that made my stomach jump at just the thought of you.
In a way where I could get lost for hours sitting next to you just talking.
In a way that the days never seemed to have enough hours because there were always more words,
more stories,
more& more& more
but never enough time.
I loved you in a way where I could be myself.
All of myself with no apologies or hesitation.
I loved your picky eating habits and the way you snored up against the back of my head that would actually pull me into my dreams.
I loved your smelly feet and the way we would lay across each other on the couch, talking,
laughing.
Trying to watch movies but falling asleep.
I loved you even when I did not love me,
and that scared me.
I loved you even when I didn't deserve to love you.
I loved you through pain and tears.
Screaming matches and lost earrings.
Misplaced iPods and broken cell phones which were thrown across empty rooms.
Through all of the drunk and disorderly.
I loved you through the bad movies and the hogged popcorn
and the way you would kiss my hand.
And my forehead.
The way your hand fit into mine.
I loved you even when I wasn't important enough to make your top four list, announced loudly to your friends at the bar, while I stood three feet away from you.
I loved you even when I hated you,
when I feared losing you.
I loved you when I lost you.
I lost you.
I lost you.